Life in the Fast Lane

November 2008
Yes, I know it's been a long time since I wrote. I can explain everything. Are you sure you want to read my excuse? Well, I've been busy. If I gave the list it will sound like I am on a treadmill. It doesn't work out that way in real life. I've become quite the night owl. I have had insomnia all my life. I remember having trouble falling asleep when I was eight or nine years old. All my life it was such an issue because I had to get up to go to work and take care of my children. Now I don't have those issues. I go to bed around one or 2 a.m. I get up around eight, throw on some clothes over my pajamas, walk the dog, and in 20 minutes I am back in bed and sleep until 10 or 11. I just love it. Sometimes I listen to a book for two or three hours and am up at 4 or 5 a.m. I don't give it a thought. Although my neighbors may be wondering what’s going on in my apartment.
I have a new method of getting books and listening. It is called the Victor Stream Reader. I can download as many as 80 books on to this player which is as big as a deck of cards. The actual chip that I put in my computer and into the reader is as big as a quarter. Isn't that amazing? I can put it in my pocket and listen to books when I take walks or when I am in the gym or on the bus or just at home. When I am out I hook it up to earphones. At home I hook it up to a speaker system so I can walk around and cook and do laundry and listen to books. I still love that multitasking.
The books are downloaded from a site called the National Library Service. They have 170,000 books. Not a lot of books. So many books I want are not on their site. Also, members are allowed to download 30 books a month. Only I feel put-upon. I am chomping at the bit waiting for the time to be up so I can get some more books. This is how I felt as a child when I was allowed to check out only 6 books at a time from the library. I was so happy to become an adult with no amount restrictions. One time I ordered over 100 books when I was doing research. They were delivered to me in cartons from the library. Now with the Internet I suppose people don’t order books like that anymore. Too bad!
I just finished reading a book called “Crashing Through” which is the true story of a man by the name of Michael May, who is alive today and lives in San Francisco. Michael, after being blind for 44 years, had his vision restored through the use of stem cell surgery. Most of the book is about his trials of trying to adjust to a new life with vision. It is quite an amazing story and I was telling my family about it. My grandson Kalyan asked me if I would want to have my good eyesight back. As I thought about it I realized that it would be as much of an adjustment to good eyesight as has been the last three years adjusting to being blind. I have built a whole life around being partially sighted. I have been looking for a good term to describe my condition or situation. In the medical world it is called legally blind, 20/800. In the blind community it is called low vision. I have called it a half cup of vision but it is a full half cup. My life is so filled up with accommodations and adjustments, all of which are quite terrific, and if I had my vision restored, all of this would go away.
My wonderful and loyal companion DaVida, who is the joy of my life. Through a variety of services I am able to take care of my self and my home so well. These include Jennifer, a volunteer through Community Services for the Blind, who comes over once every two weeks and we spend a few funny hours solving computer issues. She is so smart and has become a good friend. In fact, we set up a blog together. It is listed at the bottom of this letter. If you sign up on the blog, you will receive an email whenever there is a new posting. She has helped me build a social network here.
A terrific nurse’s aide, Analia, through my home nursing care insurance program comes several times a week. She and I do personal care and go to the market and to doctor’s appointments and bank and other kinds of chores.

Then there are services such as free directory assistance on the telephone and free movies in movie theaters and first row seats in theaters. I certainly love the attention and being special. Wherever I go people stopped to talk to me about my dog and they tell me how beautiful she is. Then they tell me about their dogs and cats, they're dead dogs and cats, how much they love dogs and cats. So there are so many conversations everywhere. If I were just the regular sighted person I would not be getting all of this attention and help. It took me quite a while to adjust to all of the help as I used to be extremely independent as you well know. But now I am enjoying it and I feel as if I am in charge and do not feel like I have lost my independence. It has been an interesting balancing act of being dependant and independent. I feel that I have accomplished it. It was not easy. The first year was extremely difficult for me as I felt that I had lost my independence. Interestingly enough, I feel in control of my life now even with all the help I get because I can decide what each person who comes here does for me. It just feels like managing a business as I have done for many years. I am so grateful to them for being in my life and making my life work.
People say it takes two to three years to adjust to new life experiences. It has been just two years since I moved to Seattle. I do love it here including the weather. Although it is often gray and dreary outside, people here are always having fun. As soon as I walk into the library, or a restaurant, or my home or someone else's home, it is always warm and full of life. I actually find it easier to be outdoors here than I ever did in Miami, where it was always hot. It is so much easier to be outdoors in cool weather. The trick is to dress properly. I have an indoor/outdoor talking thermometer and I can always check what the weather is outside before I go out. Then I dress appropriately so I can be outdoors and walk it. It is a different adjustment than if I were driving around. Then you can keep a lightweight jacket and a heavyweight jacket in the car and switch during the day. I have to dress in layers so I can discard a layer during the day when it warms up. Everyone carries a canvas bag or a backpack for that purpose. It is a different group of people who travel by bus and walk. Many are executives, working people, retired people, and then there are the others. I won't dwell on this group except to say that there is a large contingency of homeless and mentally ill will ride the buses and one has to get used to that. Enough said.
So now I have been retired for three years, legally blind for three years, a Seattle resident for two years, and a guide dog partner for 1 1/2 years. Life has fallen into an easy pattern of stress-free living. I am enjoying myself almost all the time. There are some periods of boredom, but that is not such a terrible problem. I never feel lonely. There are so many people and friends and family and helpers in my life. But I used to be an adrenaline junkie, and still feel that need running in my blood. That is why I was running three businesses until I lost my good eyesight. I always liked living on the edge. I still get that kick from playing poker but it is something to explore, but need for excitement or adrenaline kicks. I think some people like the opposite, calmness and no excitement, but not me.
For quite a while they excitement, anticipation, and worry about the economy and politics and whether Obama would get elected without any voter’s fraud preventing his election created stressing and worrying. Now that he has been elected I find myself relaxing more about politics but not economics. I trust he will gather the best minds to work on the world's problems as he has done so far. I certainly wouldn't want his job but I am so glad that he has it.
So now I find myself retired and thinking in different ways about life. I think of those less fortunate than I and how I can help them with my energy and my good intellect. There are so many people in need that it is quite overwhelming to decide which way to turn. I have been putting my energy into helping grow the Toastmasters, including the prisoners, putting energy into the Mensa group of Western Washington, putting energy into a homeless community here in Seattle, helping some of the seniors at the Unitarian Church, and looking for other roles. I, at first, didn't know how I could do volunteer work with my diminished eyesight. Now I know that my abilities as an organizer and leader are needed in every organization to which I belong. That is how I am now volunteering. It seems to be appreciated. All the practice of organizing dinners and speakers for the Wharton Club and the Harvard Club and the Yale Club and the Certified Financial Analysts have helped me become an event organizer. Now I am able to use those abilities here. So I am coming in to my own in the organizations to which I belong. You see, you knew I would find myself and I even knew, I just didn't know how it would work out. This is how it worked out and it seems so obvious. It always does after you figure it out.